Court Order Domination How to Finally Make Narcissists Fall in Line!

Disclaimer: Transcripts were generated automatically and may contain inaccuracies and errors.

0:00
hello everybody and welcome back to my
0:02
channel and today we are diving into a
0:05
topic that everybody wants to know about
0:08
and that is how to get those freaking
0:10
NES to comply with court orders once and
0:14
for all oh my goodness I know you
0:17
finally get the court order and then
0:20
what do they do they thumb their nose at
0:21
it because they think that they’re Above
0:24
the Law right they don’t have to comply
0:26
with the court order they don’t have to
0:28
do anything that they don’t want to do
0:30
and then you’re over there going how are
0:32
they getting away with this how come
0:35
everybody gets to get away with this
0:38
it’s not
0:43
[Applause]
0:45
fair I’m Rebecca Zang in case you’re
0:47
just joining me and you haven’t been
0:50
here before I am a globally recognized
0:53
negotiations and high conflict
0:55
Communications expert I’m also an
0:57
attorney I’ve been an attorney for a
0:59
long long time I have done lots and lots
1:03
of Trials I’ve worked with many many
1:05
people who’ve dealt with narcissist on
1:07
the other side I’ve done lots and lots
1:08
of Trials lots and lots of hearings lots
1:11
and lots of motions seen many many court
1:13
orders I’m also the author of slay the
1:15
bully how to negotiate with a narcissist
1:17
and win and if you are looking for
1:20
strategies to navigate high conflict
1:22
situations people and reclaim your power
1:25
you are in the right place make sure you
1:27
subscribe hit that notification Bell so
1:30
that you can never miss out on
1:33
reclaiming your power and if you like
1:36
this video make sure you give it a
1:37
thumbs up make sure you share it so that
1:39
anyone who’s ready to benefit from this
1:42
information gets that information all
1:45
right so how do you get them to comply
1:48
this is a really critical issue if
1:50
you’re dealing with narcissist or
1:52
anybody who seems like a narcissist or
1:53
they’re just a high conflict individual
1:55
especially in legal settings so let’s
1:59
understand the challenge you’re dealing
2:01
with a narcissist you get that court
2:03
order you finally win all going to be
2:06
good now right you go to Great Lengths
2:09
to get that thing in place it’s
2:12
expensive to get there judge gives it to
2:16
you now it’s frustrating because what
2:19
has happened they are defying right so
2:22
let’s say you got a child support
2:24
payment they they don’t pay or maybe
2:26
they only pay part of it or they just
2:28
pay late so maybe they say they don’t
2:31
have the money the goal is to frustrate
2:34
you exert control over you that’s the
2:38
point they get supply from that they
2:40
enjoy it they’re sadistic the first
2:43
thing is that you want to make sure that
2:46
any of these orders are very clear very
2:51
specific because if they’re nebulous in
2:54
any way they’re going to find the
2:57
loopholes right so it’s very very very
3:01
critical that court orders are very
3:04
clear very specific and especially if
3:07
there’s some kind of an agreement that
3:10
you guys wrote yourselves and then you
3:12
go and you turn it into the court and
3:14
have it turned into a court order and
3:16
the court just says okay here’s your
3:18
agreement I’m just going to ratify this
3:20
and make it into a court order and you
3:22
guys just said we’re agreeing that you
3:25
know it’s going to be whatever and
3:28
whatever you know like we’re just going
3:29
to see the kids whenever we want and
3:32
it’s just going to be you know a free
3:35
exchange or whatever HS can’t enforce
3:38
that what are they enforcing you know it
3:41
has to be very clear that I get the kids
3:46
from Friday at 3 o’ till Sunday at 2
3:48
o’clock and he didn’t bring them back
3:51
okay because then the courts can go okay
3:54
what am I enforcing well it was Sunday
3:55
at 5 and they didn’t have them so you
3:58
need to have everything clear specific
4:00
vague ambiguous language is easy for a
4:05
narsist to manipulate and they will so
4:08
if it says reasonable visitation it’s
4:11
going to be interpreted whatever way
4:14
they want and it leaves way too much
4:17
room for a narcissist to exploit instead
4:21
push for a specific schedule that says
4:24
exact times exact locations visitation
4:27
will occur every Saturday
4:30
from blah to blah and here’s where the
4:33
exchange is going to take place on this
4:36
corner or at this home who’s going to
4:38
drive because if you don’t put in who’s
4:41
driving to from where to where then
4:43
you’re going to end up doing all the
4:44
driving financial matters instead of
4:46
saying reasonable support or whatever it
4:49
has to say exact amount monthly how it’s
4:52
going to get paid get an income
4:54
deduction order if you can if you’re
4:58
worried that a person is not going to
5:01
pay make sure it gets taken directly
5:04
from their check if possible the other
5:07
thing that you can do is you can say
5:10
they’re going to pay it directly to you
5:14
but if they miss a payment or they
5:17
missed two payments and you have to go
5:20
back then whoever defaults has to pay
5:24
both sides fees that way you have to
5:28
deal with that don’t have prevailing
5:30
party language in there because when is
5:32
it prevailing default language and then
5:35
the other thing you can do is say if
5:38
they had this problem with paying then
5:41
immediately you get the income deduction
5:44
order without having to go and ask for
5:48
it again blah blah blah documentation is
5:51
the next thing you want to have
5:53
documentation is key documentation is
5:56
your best friend when dealing with a
5:58
narcissist I always say every time they
6:00
do something they’re not supposed to
6:02
then you you say thank you for the gift
6:05
oh there they go they were late on
6:07
something thank you for the gift you
6:08
write it down because that becomes a
6:11
pattern that you get to show over time
6:15
is something that they hate oh why are
6:17
you writing everything down you have to
6:18
write it all down you’re keeping your
6:19
little Journal over there they’re going
6:21
to mock you they’re going to control coo
6:23
you and you’re going to just go mhm
6:25
thank you for the gift don’t tell them
6:27
thank you for the gift what a my high
6:30
conflict negotiation coaches said oh I
6:32
told them thank you for the gift don’t
6:33
tell them thank you for the gift okay
6:35
you just say that to yourself all right
6:38
you just keep a detailed record at all
6:41
times of all interactions dates times
6:44
the nature of it okay thank you thank
6:47
you all right they fail to show up they
6:49
fail to pay note it write it down and
6:54
you keep receipts you keep proof of
6:57
payments all right there you go and you
7:00
just can summarize it down the road with
7:03
your supporting documentation right
7:05
behind your summary then that’s when you
7:07
can leverage the legal support that you
7:10
need that’s when you bring in whatever
7:13
attorney but you want to make sure
7:16
you’ve got one that understands the way
7:19
that it needs to be presented okay so
7:23
that’s where you know in my Sligh
7:24
program I have questions for vetting
7:27
attorneys I give you a little pack ET
7:30
make my attorney my Ally all of the
7:32
things because you want to make sure
7:35
that you’ve got somebody who can help
7:37
you present it in a way that’s okay this
7:41
is your game changer here’s how you can
7:44
craft it your Ironclad Fort order the
7:47
minute they are late you can go here you
7:51
go
7:52
non-compliance and then the law May
7:55
provide sanctions for you ask for San
7:59
stions tell them it needs to be enforced
8:02
there needs to be compliance here maybe
8:05
there’s sanctions ask for those if
8:08
possible and then use that court system
8:11
to your advantage Don’t Let It Go by a
8:15
lot of times people let contempt go by
8:19
oh you know they haven’t paid in so long
8:22
and they think that they’ve gotten away
8:24
with it it’s really really important
8:26
that you manage your own emotional and
8:29
psychological well-being because they
8:33
use this to their advantage they bait
8:37
you they trigger
8:39
you and then by pushing your buttons and
8:43
creating chaos then they use your
8:47
reactions against you if you’ve seen it
8:51
put I’ve seen it in the comments below
8:57
and then they they use it against you
9:00
and that’s when chaos can ensue even
9:03
more so you want your attorneys to be
9:05
filing the Motions for contempt the
9:08
Motions to enforce all the things that
9:10
need to happen but you’re in the
9:13
meanwhile making sure you’re laying the
9:17
foundation you are creating that
9:20
leverage and then that’s how you’re
9:23
going to get them to comply with those
9:27
court orders once and for all you want
9:30
strong penalties there can even be jail
9:33
time depending on the type of court
9:36
order it is child support things like
9:39
that support orders jail time can even
9:42
be some of the sanctions that are
9:44
attached to it for non-compliant parties
9:47
which can be a strong deterrent but
9:49
you’ve got to practice mindfulness
9:52
practice emotional regulation techniques
9:55
to
9:56
stay calm focused and grounded because
10:02
that’s how they they get you so you want
10:05
to have a strong support network in
10:07
place join my free private Facebook
10:09
group narcissist negotiators get my free
10:12
Crush my negotiation prep worksheet to
10:15
get started win my negotiation. comom
10:19
that will help you surround yourself
10:21
with people who understand your
10:23
situation who can offer emotional
10:26
support this might be friends family
10:28
support groups for dealing with
10:31
narcissists if you’ve ever had to deal
10:34
with this let us know I would love to
10:37
know what strategies worked for you what
10:40
tools worked for you you know just make
10:43
sure once again that you’ve got clear
10:47
language in your orders that you’ve got
10:50
default language in there that you are
10:54
filing things right away that you’re
10:57
documenting everything you are getting a
11:00
lawyer that understands your situation
11:03
that you are practicing your own
11:06
mindfulness all really good stuff to
11:09
help you because this is going to make
11:12
sure that you do what you need to do to
11:16
get them that’s what you want because
11:18
the most important thing is that you get
11:20
out of this situation move forward know
11:23
that you are whole know that you are
11:24
complete know that you were born for
11:27
more you were born for greatness you
11:29
were born for power you were born to
11:31
help others be the best person that you
11:35
are meant to be you’re not meant to be
11:37
mired in this crazy chaos so be able to
11:41
put this shield around you and be in
11:44
your light and not be in this chaos so
11:47
out of chaos comes Clarity right so and
11:51
with the right strategies and the right
11:53
support you can ensure compliance with
11:56
the court orders and protect your people
11:59
peace protect your peace of mind if you
12:01
haven’t already make sure that you like
12:03
this video make sure you share it make
12:05
sure you subscribe to my channel hit
12:07
that Bell so you don’t miss any of my
12:09
upcoming videos the next video that I
12:11
want you to watch is the role of expert
12:15
Witnesses in narcissist abuse cases
12:18
together we can slay the bully and
12:20
reclaim our power stay strong stay
12:25
empowered and until next time remember
12:27
today’s a great day to start negotiating
12:30
your best life you got this remember to
12:34
take care I’ll see you in the next video
12:37
Shopify helps Millions sell billions
12:39
around the world through their digital
12:41
courses through their digital products
12:43
at the touch of a button on their
12:45
smartphones on social media however they
12:48
want including me at shop. Rebeccas
12:51
dong.com you can access your store from
12:53
all over the world just a touch of a
12:55
button from your smartphones start
12:57
accepting payments everything you need
13:00
to sell online manage orders and develop
13:02
relationships in one place and look
13:04
fabulous doing it Shopify is the
13:07
e-commerce platform that is
13:08
revolutionizing millions of businesses
13:10
worldwide including my own at shop
13:13
Rebeccas young.com so right now what you
13:15
need to do is sign up for a $1 month
13:18
trial period at shopify.com
13:20
bestlife allower case go to shopify.com
13:24
SLB bestlife to take your retail
13:27
business to the next level level today
13:30
shopify.com
13:32
slvest L Americans spend up to 90% of
13:35
their time indoors and take 20,000
13:37
breaths a day yet according to the EPA
13:41
indoor air is actually more polluted
13:44
than outdoor air and in fact a 100 times
13:46
more polluted than outdoor air in fact
13:50
it’s responsible for up to 7 million
13:52
premature deaths annually and I know for
13:56
us we have had issues with asthma my
13:59
daughter has struggled with asthma and
14:02
that’s why we were so excited to find
14:05
Air Doctor air doctor has captured the
14:09
attention of huge media Outlets such as
14:12
CNN Money ABC and more and it filters
14:16
out
14:17
99.9% of dangerous contaminants and
14:20
allergens such as pollen pet dander dust
14:24
mites and mold and even bacteria and
14:27
viruses so you’re don’t have to do all
14:30
the that extra work so right now Air
14:34
Doctor also comes with a 30-day money
14:37
back guarantee so if you don’t love it
14:39
you just send it back for a refund minus
14:42
shipping so head to air Dr pro.com and
14:46
use the promo code your best life and
14:49
depending on the model you receive up to
14:51
39% off and up to $300 off exclusive to
14:56
podcast customers you’ll also receive a
14:58
three year warranty on any unit which is
15:01
an additional $84 value lock in this
15:04
special offer by going to air do t o r
15:09
p.com and use the promo code your best
15:13
life