Narcissists justify their behaviors in a few key ways so that they can sleep soundly at night. They convince themselves of certain things so that they can inflict pain and destruction upon others without personal consequences. What really makes a narcissist a narcissist is the fact that they cannot feel empathy for anyone else. Although they may logically know that their behaviors are wrong or abnormal, they uphold particular ideas about themselves and the world so that their fragile sense-of-self doesn’t crumble. These are things narcissists convince themselves of in order to sleep at night.
They believe that they are always right.
Remember that narcissists lack an inner sense of value. Although usually hidden from the outside world, they actually have the most fragile and sensitive egos. An admission of guilt or that they are wrong means that they have to give away a part of themselves that makes up the falsified sense of self-esteem that they have. As a means of survival, they cannot and will not admit to themselves, nor usually to others, that they are wrong. No matter how many mistakes they may have made, no matter how much clear evidence there might be- they will refuse to look at the truth if it means bruising their already incredibly sensitive egos.
They believe that you or someone else is always wrong.
Although similar to, “I’m always right;” it’s actually much deeper. They convince themselves that because they are always right, they can place the blame onto you or others. Especially when the narcissist is at fault, they will nearly always deflect blame and/or responsibility. They do this to further uphold their falsified belief that they are always right. If someone else is to blame, then they can continue to feel as if they are right.
They believe that they are above rules and laws.
Narcissists believe that rules and laws don’t apply to them. They acknowledge rules and laws but believe that they are for others- others who are lesser than them or ordinary. Narcissists have convinced themselves that they are unique and better than those around them. This belief is reflected in their ability to cross boundaries, break rules, laws, and social norms without guilt, remorse, or shame.
They move on and try to forget about their behaviors
They place little value on the consequences of their behavior or other people’s emotions surrounding their behaviors.
If there is a conflict of any kind or their behavior is being exposed, they will do whatever they can to move on – and convince you to move – so that they can continue on with their distorted perspective of themselves and the world. Accepting blame will or looking within will crush everything that they believe in in order to survive. It’s best for their peace-of-mind to just move on and forget about everything they have ever done that could be perceived negatively.