To create a smoother path for yourself and maximize your chances of getting what you want from the divorce proceedings, enlist the services of a high-conflict divorce coach. This is a type of high-conflict negotiation coach that can mean the difference between a drawn-out divorce full of court dates and a peaceful, amicable resolution.
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What Is a High-Conflict Negotiation Coach?
High-conflict negotiation coaches are essential in the divorce realm, particularly when there is potential for a high degree of conflict. They act as a neutral third party and work with a divorcing couple to resolve disputes in a way that both parties find fair and equitable. They also help identify other issues that must be resolved before divorce agreements can be finalized.
Many people confuse high-conflict negotiation coaches with marriage therapists. While both help solve problems, negotiation coaches don’t do it with the intent to save a marriage—they offer creative solutions that apply to different aspects of a divorce, such as child support, custody, alimony, and asset divisions.
Negotiation coaches are also often confused with divorce attorneys or judges. While negotiation coaches will guide people through the divorce process and coach them to get what they want out of the divorce settlement, they do not serve as official legal representatives like divorce attorneys do. Negotiation coaches also differ from judges in that they work directly with divorcing couples to help them reach an agreement, whereas a judge will rule without working with the couple.
Why Should I Consult a High-Conflict Divorce Coach?
High conflict is a part of so many divorces. It can make divorce proceedings longer and more painful than is necessary and even skew the settlement results. Enlisting the help of a high-conflict divorce coach can help you with the following:
Avoid Court
Divorce is very rarely like what you see in movies, with an angry divorcing couple being represented by arguing lawyers while a judge pounds his gavel and demands order in the court.
In fact, considering the emotional roller coaster leading up to divorce, an intense and potentially volatile court proceeding is the last thing most divorcing couples want. Many people don’t realize this, but everything that needs to be resolved in a divorce can very often happen with the help of a high-conflict divorce coach, allowing the couple to avoid a court date altogether.
Additionally, it’s often in your best interest to avoid resolution in court, not simply for the added negative emotions involved. Because the court’s decision doesn’t include working closely with the couple, it can often leave one party (or both) feeling shortchanged and unhappy.
On the other hand, a high-conflict divorce coach is very involved in helping both parties communicate effectively and find common ground. By taking this approach, high-conflict divorce coaches help divorcing couples take control over their divorce instead of leaving it up to the courts and hoping for the best.
Another advantage that comes with avoiding court is the less formal atmosphere. The strict court setting can immediately increase tension and resentment, while a private mediation is more relaxed, leading to calmer feelings and more amicable solutions.
Save Time and Money
Avoiding court can save you thousands in legal fees. Resolving a divorce with the help of a high-conflict divorce coach instead of turning things over to the court is much more budget-friendly—and at such a volatile time financially, saving every penny only helps your emotions.
Working with a high-conflict divorce coach is also more convenient because meetings can be scheduled according to the couple’s time frame rather than the court’s. Many divorcing couples are shocked by the amount of time it takes to finalize a divorce. Waiting for court dates on the judge’s timetable can leave you stuck in a drawn-out, stagnant divorce.
Negotiations with a divorce coach, on the other hand, can be scheduled at your convenience, finalizing everything much more quickly.
Reduce Conflict
As the name suggests, high-conflict negotiation coaches help turn down the temperature in heated disputes. High-conflict divorce coaches provide a neutral, safe environment to foster communication between couples who disagree either a little or a lot.
Though they’re not therapists, high-conflict divorce coaches can help even the most contentious couples work through their feelings and come to agreeable compromises.
Working with a high-conflict divorce coach has the added benefit of helping you learn conflict-resolution skills in other areas of your life. Even after your divorce is over, you can use these techniques in the workplace and your social circles to work through disagreements.
Strategic Planning and Leverage Creation
High-conflict negotiation coaches are adept at understanding how high-conflict personalities operate. This unique insight allows them to create effective strategies and leverage by anticipating and countering the tactics often employed by such individuals.
One of the key ways they accomplish this is through meticulous documentation review. By analyzing documents, coaches can identify patterns that may not be immediately apparent. They know how to interpret this information in light of relevant statutes and how to utilize witnesses, correspondence, videos, texts, and other evidence to build a compelling case.
This comprehensive approach ensures that every piece of evidence is strategically used to strengthen your position. High-conflict negotiation coaches guide you in compiling all necessary documentation, which can then be presented to your attorney. This preparation not only streamlines the legal process but also enhances your chances of achieving a favorable outcome.
Understanding the Victim’s Psyche
High-conflict negotiation coaches are not only experts in strategy but also deeply attuned to the psychological impact of dealing with high-conflict personalities. They understand that victims often suffer from complex PTSD (CPTSD), brain fog, and paralyzing fears that can hinder their ability to make sound decisions. These coaches provide essential tools and techniques to help you navigate these emotional hurdles.
By working with a high-conflict negotiation coach, you can overcome mental blocks and fears, gaining the confidence needed to assert yourself effectively. They offer emotional support and practical advice tailored to your specific situation, empowering you to face the challenges of your divorce with resilience and clarity. This psychological support is invaluable, helping you regain control of your life and approach negotiations from a position of strength.
Turning to a High-Conflict Divorce Coach
If you’re heading toward divorce or you’re already in the midst of it, it can feel like you have nowhere to turn and no one on your side. Even the courts can sometimes rule against you, turning your divorce into something out of your worst nightmares.
That’s why it’s so important to turn to a high-conflict divorce coach. With a neutral third party working in your best interest, you can significantly lower the tension and stress of a divorce.
You’ll save time and money, finalizing your divorce more quickly and allowing you to move on toward a brighter future with less trauma and baggage.